Possibly the dorkiest thing I’ve ever written.  My apologies to LL Cool J, and Leica.

This is meant to be rapped to the music of “Mama Said Knock You Out“.

Enjoy.

—Peter.

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“Leica Said Manually Focus”

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[Leica]

C’mon Canon

[News Report]

And with the latest DPreview news… Leica with a triumphant comeback

(mumble, mumble..)
but tonight…

[Leica]

Don’t call it a comeback
I been here for years
Rockin with film and puttin SLRs in fear
Makin images rain down like an iPhone

Listen to the shutter go “click”
The silence, overpowerin
Over the competition, I’m following.
Wreckin shots, when I miss focus then it’s all your fault
Don’t you dare stare, you betta learn
Don’t ever compare
Me to the rest at base ISO, but on high it’s just a no-go
(Leica man’s payin the price)

[Chorus:]

I’m gonna manually focus (Huh?)
Leica said manually focus (Huh?)

[REPEAT 4X]

Don’t u call this a regular cam
I’m all German, man

I’m gonna take this itty bitty image so slow
And I’m already warm
Just like HCB (they called him Henri)
Watch me bash this Panny like an Oly
Cuz u know I share an LCD wit
Why do u riff with me, the allemande psycho
And when I pull out my SD get ready cuz it might go
BLAAAAW, how ya like your corrupted card now???
Solms will not allow
U to get with, Mr. K, dont riff
Highlights getting all clipped
I’m dated, but-class’n
Kinda like your dad, so u could say I’m passé.

Old IIIg filled my mind
But I came into a digital life.

[Chorus]

[Leica]

Breakdown!!!

Shadow clickin’ when I saw you on SteveHuffPhoto (HUUUH!!!)
I just don’t know
What made you forget that I shot raw?
But now Seal’s got a new tour
I’m goin insane, startin the hurricane, releasin M
Lettin you know that Sony can’t gain, I maintain
‘Cause I exploit my name
Live view, killin
Leica diggin’ a hole
(Pass the film roll)

[Chorus]

Nikon blasts are heard
When I’m on, I turn off, at WILL
Man it takes me an hour, to capture a flower.
I’m gonna tie you up and let you understand
that I’m not your average cam
when you got a Nocti in your hand
DAAAAAM!!!!! Oooooohh!!
Listen to the way they saaaaay, your crew
Expensive! (UHH), expensive! (UHH), expensive! (UHH), expensive!
Moiré, noise, and banding.
Pass me a poser so suckas I’ll play him.
Photogs (What!!!) Photogs (What!!!)
I’m ready (we’re ready!!!)
I think I’m gonna miss a shot (did you get that?)
Don’t u neva, eva, pull my lever
Cuz I explode
And my insides are likely to erode
I gotta thank God
Cuz he gave me a history to exploit
HARD!!

Manually focus, Leica said manually focus

[Chorus]